It's a learning curve

Friday, March 13, 2009

Hubs and I have been married just over 1 year now and there are a few things I've learnt along the way. Some things I've worked out for myself, some things have been taught by Hubs, and there have been some pearls of wisdom shared by people in the know along the way. Here are a few I'd like to share with you:

Pick your battles. This is one I've learnt via all 3 of the above ways. I used to fight all of the little disagreements that we had, and realised it got me nowhere.

2. One of the best, most important and most appreciated gifts I can give Hubs is my undivided attention. Even if it's for 5 minutes in the morning before I head to work, it makes him feel like the most important person in my world and starts our day wonderfully.

3. Respect for each other's differences. Just respect in general really, but Hubs and I are quite different in a lot of ways, which sometimes means we don't understand where the other is coming from. I've learnt (the hard way) to take a step back and try and see things from his perspective. And if I can't, I've realised that's okay.

4. Safety first. Hubs has created in our marriage, an assurance that we are safe together. And I don't mean physically, I mean emotionally. There is nothing that I'm afraid of telling him. I know that no matter what I say, no matter how crazy, unrealistic, irrational, no matter what, Hubs will listen and not judge me. I know that I can share all of my hopes and dreams and disappointments and fears and craziness with him, and he will not only embrace it all, he'll love me even more for it. I hope I do the same for him, though my impulsive tendencies sometimes get in the way, but I'm learning! Which brings me to my next point:

5. Take a deep breath and don't react to situations/comments/actions straight away. This one I'm learning from Hubs. There have been quite a few times in our relationship when I have reacted without considering intentions/motivations (not just Hubs') behind things, and more often than not there has been a misunderstanding and I end up looking and feeling slightly foolish.

So that's about all for now. I could go on and on but I don't want to share all my wisdom in one sitting! What a journey it has been so far, and what an adventure our life together will be!

And here's some photos, cos you know, everybody likes photos!!

Hubs and I on our honeymoon in Vanuatu with our hair braided (my scalp got SO sunburnt!!)

A week later when we took the plaits out:

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