Afraid of the dark
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Yesterday and today have been pretty cruisey and not terribly newsworthy, so I'm going to blog about something I've been thinking about for a while. The fact that I'm afraid of the dark.
It's great at this time of the year as it doesn't get dark here til about 8:30pm. For as long as I can remember I've been afraid of the dark and I don't like it. I'd like to change that about myself. Any suggestions?
Because of this fear, I absolutely HATE staying at home on my own overnight. During the day I'm absolutely fine, and feel that I can handle it, but as soon as it starts getting dark, I start getting anxious. It's so ridiculous! All I want to do is lock myself in my room and will myself to sleep all night long. Don't even get me started on having to get up in the middle of the night to pee when I'm all alone. If I don't do it straight away, it can take half an hour to summons the courage.
So what am I afraid of? I think burglars are the big one for me, even though I have never ever ever been robbed. That is just so irrational! I think I've watched too many movies where getting up in the middle of the night ends badly. I do wish I were made of tougher stuff.
I read a quote by Marie Curie stating "Nothing is to be feared, only understood" and I'm really trying to embrace that. I don't want to spend my life fearing something that will likely never happen. What a waste of energy that is!
Anyway, if you have any suggestions about how to become less afraid of "the dark" I would love to hear them...
The funny thing about feeling isolated is that normal rational vanished, you have no-one else to verify what's realistic and what's in your head. Think this becomes worse when you wake up in the middle of the night, because you've just been immersed in the would of dreams which just before waking up seems as real as anything else.
As a rule, I generally won't watch anything 'frightening' in the evening. I think it helps to give the relaxed subconscious which comes with daytime time to process all the emotions and thoughts that come along with it. As a general rule, I just avoid any horror genre or things who's only intent is to scare me in the first place. In daylight hours, it's quite obvious that vampires aren't real. Wake up at 3am alone, suddenly it becomes a real possibility.
I find if you know things will freak you out at night, know what those things are and prepare in the day. Would having a baseball bat by the bed make you feel more safe when you wake at 2am? then put one there in the day and practice grabbing it during day light hours. The things that seem silly now will help you're frantic brain at night that is terrified and relying heaving on instinct.
Tree cast a scary shadow on window at night? go cut it off in daylight. You laugh that it's silly the next morning, but go do it anyway. Same with shirts draped on chairs etc...
Talking to other people can also help, as it's the isolation that really gets to you. If it's 3am and you don't feel you can call someone, jump online and join a US based chat. IRC or somewhere else where you can join in or just watch conversations go by. Will allow you to feel connected to the world against and not isolated.
Just some ideas, enjoy!
Wow thanks Nate! Certainly some rational thinking behind irrational thoughts. Will try some of your techniques in the coming weeks!